Whack! News: 23.03.08

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Alien prank gone wrong

I will not spoil this by telling what happens. Got to see this for yourself.

Boobs in slow mo

This has to be the coolest thing right after the slow no bitch slap video. Now where did I put that one? Anyway everything in slow mo looks good. Well almost everything.

16 Improv Everywhere Agents stage a spontaneous musical in a shopping mall food court in Los Angeles. Haha can I get a napkin too, please? They should do this kind of things where I come from. That will be just plain boring.

Vigara in your water? Gnooze

The Governor of New York in a prostitution scandal, drugs in your drinking water, and the Israeli Foreign Minister visits Washington DC. Marta Costello hosts the gnooze (the g is silent) - today’s top stories in about 3 minutes. She is cute and sure knows how to tell the news. You go girl!

Curiosity nearly the cat

An Arizona couple has been spending weeks trying to find a cat that was stuck in the walls of their new home. The cat belonged to a neighbor, and was finally rescued at great expense to the home. Now how the heck did the poor pussy, I mean cat, get stuck in the walls? I thought cats were pretty flexible body bending creatures? This one must have smelled a rat or a fish. Curiosity killed the cat, almost.

Easy to make Xmas ornament

Video is a little lengthy for our standards but please, for those who are interested, read through Christmas isn't here yet, so this gives you ample time to prepare those cheapskate ornaments. Now everyone will know that Mr & Mrs. Jones are a bunch of cheapos.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Whack! News Special: Most boring trial, ever!

Talk about the most boring trial, like ever. It seems like the former president of Peru must have been so bored during the trial that he practically fell asleep. Tired? I doubt it.

Miss Bimbo Ahoy!

Another case of the Britons at it. What is wrong with these Brits anyway? But then again, if kids are unaware and media-hyped, which they usually are, they're going to be in for a lot of fun. On the lighter side, it's just a website. Why take such things seriously unless you're a web freak, like me. Girls, stay away.

Canada's annual seal hunt

Wait, how does a seal die humanely? That doesn't make any sense. What the heck is wrong with these Canadians? Let's start a World annual Canadian seal hunters hunt and start whacking 'em Canadians away and let's see how humanely they die. Morons.

10 fingerprints required at JFK Airport

Hey, let's take all the toeprints and genital measurements as well for all those foreign passengers. While we're at it, let's take their hair sample and even the mucus from their noses and the broccoli from their teeth. I'm sure with all these added security measures, it will be a safer place.

Who the heck is Vanessa?

Wow. This has to be the most wonderful video I have ever seen. It shows you just about nothing, save for a naked woman who supposedly goes by the name of Vanessa and that's it. Total silence. I wonder what they were hoping to achieve with this one. Yes, I am helping to advertise this silent killer.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Whack! News Special : Lottery winner back at McDonald's!

No offense to the Welsh but I honestly think this guy is a complete nutcase. What kind of idiot spends 18 months living the rich life without making himself richer and going back to working at McDonald's? Dude, you could've bought the McDonald's franchise and given jobs to more people with all that money if you really love those McDonald folks so much. Yeah money is not everything in life. Stupidity is, for some. Sheesh

Britons sure are weird : Part deux. Bogus 999 calls.

Another case of Britons at it, again. No, not sex. Stupidity. Okay, I totally understand the whole changing TV channels and taking out the garbage for some whacked out reason but I couldn't help laughing at the idea of getting a cop to prepare cups of tea! What on earth are these people thinking? The next time you really need help with some problem, the cops are sure to say, 'Not my cup of tea'. Heh. I just had to do that.

Disgruntled Easter bunny

Here is a classic case of the disgruntled Easter bunny man. Someone, please give him more Easter eggs, bunnies (Playboy bunnies would be an excellent idea) or carrots. Dude, it's Easter man. What the heck are you thinking displacing a baby? We should all do ourselves a favour and let Santa settle this one with some good old spanking. Parents: Keep your child/kid away from the newly appointed Disgruntled Bunny Man!

Whack! News Special : Wacky Bras for charity!

Awesome. Let's take this one step further and auction off used bras, camisoles, panties, boxers, condoms, femidoms, sanitary pads, tampons and whatever other insider wear you can think off. At least, it gives due credit for those people who are frantically searching for buyers at eBay or Yahoo! Auctions. Or wait, they're not. In case you're wondering, no, we do not buy used stuff like that but we secretly kind of like that kinky idea. Do not tell anyone. It's our secret.

Britons sure are weird

I guess in their country screwing someone's daughter or wife without permission may not be such a serious etiquette breach after all. The kind of surveys people come up with these days. What next?

World's tallest man, again

Now this Ukranian is the tallest. It seems like people are getting taller by the day. I am short, by the way. I wonder if people are actually placed all around the world to spot these tall folks. Or is the government secretly spying on us using high-tech satellites? Either way, if you're too something, it usually takes a while for you to get used to the somewhat everyday world. Do not fret, big, err, tall guy, you'll fit right in. Please, watch the head. In other news, World's Stupidest Man title still goes to George W. Bush. Congrats old man, you sure knocked 'em dead. Oops, no pun intended.

Brief overview of Hypnosis

A follow up interview to the case of the 'Hypnotic Thief. Now whether this is real or not, it doesn't matter. The reporter, the hypnosis expert and I are just helping to boost the popularity of this case and the Italian. Isn't that what news is all about? Now stop staring at the screen lest you get hypnotized by this post. Viva Italia!

Plus Size Miss England pageant finalist

Hey, you go girl! Here is a fine example for all those skinny-crazed media people out there that size does not matter. I'm proud of this girl. And not to mention, she looks sweet. Heads up for all those plus size women out there. Ladies, if you feel you're too fat and constantly worry about your weight, look up to this woman. No, that does not guarantee you a place in any beauty pageant competition. Sorry.

Flying Car!

Alright all you car junkies, it's finally here! As expected, of course. The flying car! Yes, it really flies! Now all you have to do is wait till the price drops, unless you're really rich then go get it. Point to note, if you intend to travel to another jurisdiction or city, please don't use this.

Burnt out meat

In the heart of tragedy, someone has to poke fun at something. No offense but here it goes. Talk about having all that burnt out meat. I wonder how long it take for the fire to burn itself out when it starts to spread. A case of intentional mishap? What do you think?

Killer Grandmas

The next time you see an innocent sweet old lady in the streets or anywhere for that matter, be afraid. Be very afraid! She might be your next serial killer in the making. Unless she is too old to lift a dangerous weapon, you're safe. But then again, they somehow always carry a handbag they used to hit you and that hurts. Ouch.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Well, at least Conan the minuscule not-so-barbarian knows how to enjoy life. Just what we need, more material loving pets. Hey, at least they become the envy of their owners and know how to shine in the media.

Never hypnotize someone and steal their money

Italian police have issued surveillance video of a man who appeared to hypnotize a supermarket cashier before stealing money from her cash register. Always remember, never hypnotize someone and steal their money. Well, never steal money at all.

Howto make a Black or White Russian

Cool. I've always liked the Black Russian. Now I just need to find the ingredients to make the drink. Now if I can only find the recipe to find Russian girls.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

3 zebras thwarted in break for freedom

First, we had the cows escape and now we have zebras making their way for it. Looks like animals are getting smarter or watching too much Prison Break.

Croatian claims biggest chocolate castle record

Either he must have been overloaded on aphrodisiacs to not get tempted by that much chocolate or he must really dislike chocolate candy. Maybe he had a really hot honey glazed babe next to him. Well, here's a suggestion. How about building the world's largest interlinked chain of used condoms? No, they will not be for sale, given to charity or to be consumed.

Woman, 57, finds lump is baby, not cancer

Now that's really nice. You're never too old to get pregnant. A word of advice to older couples. It's still not too late to hump about but if you're actually going to do it, get some protection. You never know what might pop in there. And oh, make sure you get get every lump checked!

Iphones: Instant IQ or instant irritant?

Now that's taking the smart phone a little too literally, eh? I dread what else can be done with a smart phone. The last thing we need is someone becoming stupid with a smart phone.

I totally Digg it, dig it?

At the time of this writing, it seems Digg has somehow disabled their new user registration link. Their Join Digg link redirects to their main site. Kind of reflects badly on a site of massive proportions. Now, I wonder which Digg user would have the chance to digg this story? I totally dig it! Oh, for the record, I've already posted this story on Slashdot. Let's see if it gets approved and if I get Slashdotted. Oh, and you're probably the first to see this story, here.

Paint Golf

Tiger Woods when he has absolutely nothing better to do. But hey, it is a creative way to make money. So start teeing away, with paint! Adults, you've been warned. Keep your kids away from paint or golf balls. I mean golf sticks.

Jesus rocks!

A North Carolina woman found a stone she says shows an image of Jesus Christ after a hurricane destroyed her home. Now, she's putting her sacred rock up for auction on E-Bay. There you have it. Jesus officially rocks!

Now we can have really cool kids

Children at Rosinka children's daycare centre in Nizhny Novogord are made to run outside in sub-zero temperatures in nothing but underwear. They also have to endure ice cold showers and lots of exercise. Their teacher's s belief it does them good and their parents are delighted. And you thought the Japanese were weird.

The things people steal these days

The priceless legacy of Portugal's Moorish past is vanishing as thieves rip distinctive painted tiles from public buildings, palaces and museums to sell on the international black market. Police are tackling the problem with an awareness campaign called "SOS Azulejo" to dissuade trade in suspect goods.The priceless legacy of Portugal's Moorish past is vanishing as thieves rip distinctive painted tiles from public buildings, palaces and museums to sell on the international black market. Police are tackling the problem with an awareness campaign called "SOS Azulejo" to dissuade trade in suspect goods.

What kind of news format would you prefer to see here?

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Monday, March 24, 2008

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Whacked!

About Me

Million Blog List

Blog Archive

BidVertiser

Join BidVertiser

JunkieYard's Blog A Post And Winner For Week Two!!!

If you like my blog, please donate to my poor soul

Entrecard - Drop it like it's hot!

BlogCatalog

Link me up and hook me up!

Zeriouz Network - Thousands of backlinks in weeks

FeedBurner FeedCount

Hungry? Ged Fed

Site Meter

Google News