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Monday, April 7, 2008

Whack! News Special: Chimp shot dead by Police



Woah. Major weird story we've got here. The chimp failed to respond to the police officer's warnings? The officer gave two warnings before he fired several times? What the heck is going on with these Texan cowboy officers? Heya cowboy! That is a chimp, you know, a chimpanzee. It doesn't speak or understand English. Even if it was trained to understand certain verbal commands, it sure wouldn't understand something like, 'Put down the stun gun Mr Chimp or I will fire at will!' The next time you see a violent animal on the streets, make sure you call the cops and they will give verbal warnings to these animals too and for failure of compliance, be forced to shoot, an unspecified number of times. Sheer asinine reporting.

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