Please, someone arrest the damn candle already. We do not need such these arson candles in our lives anymore! While you're at it, go out there and look for more suspicious looking arson candles. You never know when they might strike. Beware citizens of the world. Your next lit candle may cause a fire in you, literally. By the way, anyone got a light? I'm starving for a smoke. Oh look, a lit candle. How convenient.
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